


Opened My Eyes, Now I Realise

by omgbellamy



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Anger, Azgeda, Clarke is Clarke, Confessions, End of the World, Episode: s04e02 Heavy Lies the Crown, F/M, Grounder Culture, Jealousy, Love, Minor Character Death, Polis, Politics, Sparring, Training, World-Saving, bellamy is angry, can echo die, echo is a snarky bitch, gina deserved better, kane is o wiseman, let bellamy live
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-11
Updated: 2017-02-11
Packaged: 2018-09-23 14:10:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,935
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9660701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/omgbellamy/pseuds/omgbellamy
Summary: Clarke and Bellamy are working hard to save the world. In the midst of the chaos, an unexpected visitor arrives in Arcadia with more than one Agenda. Clarke doesn't like it, and neither does Bellamy. This leads Clarke to some unexpected realizations and the fuckery that comes with feelings.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Set between 4x02-4x04? Just some speculation on my part. Probably will never be canon, but I have to dream when the show doesn't feed me this well. Sorry for errors. Enjoy.

They had been busy for the past week. Raven was on edge trying to get the ship built to sustain their people, Clarke and Bellamy were busy with their own issues and trying to find another viable source to house all of their people. Nobody let Bellamy forget his decision and he didn't either. But he didn't regret it – well, not much. He'd made a decision and he'd stuck with it, or 'made the call', as his friends had put it.

He justified it. He couldn't let them die in there, living a life of being puppeted by someone else, Grounders for that matter. He should've been surprised they were using their people as slaves but he wasn't, not really. And the little girl he'd saved, Ember, her name was. He couldn't leave her. He could never do that. 

Perhaps it was his own complex that led him to make the latter decision, but he knew it was more. He did want to reedeem himself, yes, but this wasn't about redemption. This was about honour and as someone who a younger sibling, the only one on the history of the Ark, he couldn't leave her. Octavia was and always would be his kid sister and where her absence was an ache followed. Never would he condemn a child to death if there was something he could do to help them.

He was working with some guards, training them. He spent some of his time doing this when not in meetings with Kane, Abby, Clarke and Raven. Monty sometimes showed up too to led a hand with the science and he and Raven often spent long nights hauled up in her place discussing theories and ways to survive.

He got off his shift and went straight to Clarke's room. It was something that had become quite frequent between the two of them over the past week. Something unspoken between them that they just needed, craved from the other. 

What he didn't expect to find was Clarke sat on a chair, head on her desk, face in her hands, crying. After that night, things were different between them. He'd comforted her in a way that he'd never done for anyone but Octavia, and even then he felt weird about it. There was only a handful of times he'd come to find Clarke crying in his time and times when they'd spill their guts to each other. Bellamy wasn't one for expressing feelings around his friends but somehow Clarke unlocked that side of him. He'd comforted her that night and told her he had hope because they were still breathing and that they'd be able to do it.

Clarke believed him. He gave her hope in a way that nobody else – not even her mom-, could. She worked tirelessly alongisde everyone to try to make sure they'd survive. She'd even deliberated how they would decide who would live and die whilst wrestling with her guilty conscience. Why should I have a right to decide who lives and who dies? She thought to herself. It should be everyone on this list. Not like the Ark where its down to who is useful and who's not.

Clarke didn't tell anyone about the list. Not even Bellamy. She neglected to mention as well that his name was right at the top of the list, along with her friends, her mother and Kane. She left herself out, knowing that she didn't deserve to survive. How could Wanheda be viable for a safe space in the human race? After all, she had brought the hell of radiation on them, technically. She had become what Oppenhiemer had said: death, destroyer of worlds. She and Bellamy. But that was all pointless now with the new hell coming...

She struggled with the weight of leadership. Her mother knew it, Raven knew it, Bellamy knew it. But she was determined to fufill her duty like her father did and aid the saving of their people for one last time. Even if she didn't get to live, she wanted that for her people. For her mother and her friends, who deserved a damn second to breathe and live as they always wanted to. With the blood staining her hands, she'd never be able to forgive herself or let it go fully. No, that would be much too easy for her.

It was early when it happened. Everyone important was up for the start to a New week in Arcadia. Clarke had been in the medbay checking on the people sick from radiation.

“You okay, Luna?” Clarke had asked.

Luna eyed her, green eyes rolling back. “I'm fine. I just want to go home to my people.”

“You can't, Luna,” Clarke told her with a sigh, “You're sick.”

“Sick? I never get sick.”

“You are,” Clarke told her. “But this is...different.”

“Different?” Luna echoed. “How?”

“It's from a rise in radiation,” Clarke explained, “Your body is not adapting to dealing with this kind of level of radiation, so its making you sick.”

“But radiation levels have been fine for 97 years,” Luna said, confused, “Why would it be rising now?” 

Clarke, adopting a hushed voice, gave Luna the rundown of the radiation situation and the effects of it.

“Well,” Luna said, “Guess you need to keep me here, huh?”  
Clarke nodded. 

Suddenly then, Bellamy burst into the med-bay. Clarke turned, eyes wide and worried, excusing herself from Luna and making her way to him. “Bellamy! Everything okay? You okay?”

Bellamy nodded. “I'm fine. But there's a situation, Clarke. Kane told me to come find you.” Clarke followed Bellamy wordlessly, knowing that he was serious. 

When they reached the front gates of Arcadia, they were created with an unpleasant surprise. Two Ice Nation guards, Kane and Echo on horseback. She looked over at Arcadia and then down at Clarke, glaring. “I'm here on behalf of Roan of Ice Nation, my King,” she announced.

Bellamy stepped forward, a frown on his face. He crossed his arms at her, stance protective. “What kind of 'business' could you have that brings you to Arcadia?”

“She needs an answer,” Kane said to Bellamy.

Bellamy's eyes shifted to Kane. He remained silent.

“I need to know if your dear little sister killed one of the clan's ambassadors,” Echo said.

Bellamy stiffened. He never wanted to believe his sister would kill anymore than she needed to but with her recent behaviors he wouldn't be surprised. “And how could I possibly know that?” Bellamy fired back. “We have been back here Arcadia for two weeks. My sister has been in Polis helping Kane with the coalition.”  
“I'm aware. But unfortunately, Bellamy, I have to ask. My King's will must be done.”

Bellamy rolled his eyes all the way back. He was tired of Echo and her behavior. He didn't trust her and he wasn't prepared to extend an olive branch to her for forgiveness. Not after Gina. 

“I'm afraid I'm gonna disappoint you then: I don't know anything about my sister's activities whilst she's been in Polis, but I'm sure she wouldn't do that. Octavia's smarter than to destroy the coalition."

Echo nodded. “I thought that too, Bellamy, but there's been lots of rumors floating around about your sister and her killing tendencies. Gossip spreads fast in Polis.”

Bellamy clenched his fists, resisting himself from going and pulling her off the horse. Kane gave him a warning look, noticing his anger. 

Clarke didn't like Echo one bit. No, she hated her. She didn't like the way she was sniffing around their home for answers to questions they did not know about and she certainly did not like her attitude. But even when Echo posed the question, Clarke had to wonder: had Octavia killed this Ambassador? If she had, why? Was she just bloodthirsty? Or was it tactful like Clarke thought? She knew Octavia and she knew whilst she was hurt, she wouldn't be stupid enough to let her kill be found unless it was a tactful decision.

“Echo has also come to discuss further terms for the coalition,” Kane told Bellamy and Clarke. “She'll be staying with us for a few days.”

Everyone was stunned into silence. Echo turned to look at Bellamy, flashing him a smirk as the gates opened and she rode through on her horse, guards in suit behind her. Bellamy glared at her back as she entered their home and turned to Kane who now stood beside them.

“I couldn't stop Roan from sending her,” Kane said apologetically. “Just please don't lose control. Our coalition depends on it.” He clasped Bellamy on the shoulder and gave him a nod, in which Bellamy returned. Once again, Kane was right. As much as he wanted to, Bellamy couldn't lose control. They had a job to do and people to save and he had no time to be irrational just because of the presence of one girl.

It turned out Echo's trip was an extended one. She spent days with them in Arcadia in guest quarters. She talked to their people, ate their food and was very much a big presence in their place. Overall she was met with reluctance with talk going around Arcadia that she was from Ice Nation. She practiced sparring too, requesting one day that she spar with Bellamy in their training room. He was quick to deny her request, not wanting to give into the sick game she was playing with him. But Kane stopped him, telling him it was important for the coalition to keep good relations with Ice Nation, especially with the King's renowned adviser.

Bellamy begrudgingly obliged, meeting Echo in the empty training room one late afternoon. She was already decked out in training gear, guards on standby like always. She smirked when she saw him enter. “Bellamy. How nice to see you again.” He couldn't tell if she was mocking or not, but he didn't like it.

“Let's just train, Echo. Skip the pleasantries.” 

“Sure.”

Bellamy picked up his wooden mock sword, getting ready in the training circle. Echo followed. He swung it forward, aiming for her shoulder, but she blocked it, locking swords with his own. They sparred for a while, the only sound of their mingled breaths and the clapping sound of wood meeting wood.

“You know,” Echo said, “I never thought I'd get a chance to train with a real man. I've trained with Roan a lot, but it's not the same. You can definitely hold your own.”

“I'm a trained guard. It's what I do. I'm a protector,” Bellamy grunted, trying to drown her voice out of his head whilst simultaneously launching his sword at her.

She kicked him, managing to get him stumbling back a bit. He retaliated quickly, mirroring her move and getting her to stumble back also. She recovered quickly and jumped back into her stance of back and forth, back and forth.

“I know you are. I saw that when you saved me in Mount Weather.”

Bellamy stiffened momentarily at the mention of the dark place, but sobered once he realized her agenda. “You were a hero, Bellamy. I'm so sorry for what happened.”

He gritted his teeth as he swung forward again. “Don't.”

“No really, I am. I never wanted that to happen. But then Lexa betrayed your people and--”

Bellamy continued to aggressively swing at Echo, who met him with equal fire. They were both sweating by now having not given up the competition yet.

“Stop. it.”

“Bellamy, please, I just need to apologize--”

That was the last straw. He grabbed her by her shirt, flinging her against the wall so fast and so hard that she barely broke the fall. He launched the weapon forward, holding it across her throat. He was breathing heavily, body flooding with anger and adrenaline. 

“Thats. Enough.” The words came out menacingly between Bellamy's gritted teeth. He had let himself down and had lost control. 

Echo looked bewildered but also kind of amused. “I am sorry you know,” she told him. “For everything that happened in Mount Weather the second time. Your girlfriend was just collateral damage.”

“Shut up!” He yelled. He was right in her face now, anger seeping through his veins like wildfire, dark eyes glaring into the muted green of Echo's irises. She didn't look afraid of him and that enraged him. After she'd killed his girlfriend and she still had the sheer audacity to come here, to fuck with him to try to play her way into receiving his forgiveness.

Bellamy grabbed her even harder after she let out a low chuckle. “There it is.” 

Bellamy flung her to the floor, pining her body beneath him, wooden sword at her throat. “There it is,” she gasped. “There's that fire I was waiting for!”

Clarke hadn't seen Bellamy all day. She was getting anxious as it was almost time for them to have dinner now. She'd asked around and nobody had seen him and she'd feared he'd gone off somewhere. He did that sometimes, only she'd usual find him just down by the river or on the top of the guard tower watching out for a threat that didn't exist. He was always vigilant and always working and she just...well, yeah, she missed him.

She missed her co-leader and best friend. These past few days were busy with the beginning of rationing and the increase in radiation sickness that flooded Arcadia. And now with Echo's arrival things were complicated.

She'd checked everywhere, now heading to the training room to hope she'd find him there, betting he'd gone just to release his frustrations. She opened the door and it hit her like a lightning bolt.

There she saw him.

“Stop this, Echo,” he warned. “You don't want to make mad.”

“Or what? Make me shut up, Bellamy,” she said in a seductive whisper. 

Bellamy launched the wooden sword back, ready to launch it at her.

However he was beaten to it. Echo stopped his attack and before he even knew what was happening. He was pinned beneath her, arms and legs restrained. “Looks like I win,” she said.

And Clarke walked in just then.

Clarke gasped, feeling like she intruded on a moment. She felt her blood boil as she looked over at Echo's smirking face, who was now staring at her with such smugness it made her mad. Bellamy turned too, bewildered and shocked at Clarke's presence. She scanned his body and found he'd wrenched her off of him. “Get away from him,” Clarke sneered, marching forward to Bellamy's side. She shielded him, shocked at how overprotective she was feeling. Echo had got up, now stepping into Clarke's face. “Why?” She asked. 

Because he doesn't belong to you, Clarke's conscience sneered, He's mine.

The thought was there before she could stop it. Clarke was shocked and frightened of her possessive behavior. “You could have hurt him,” Clarke said instead. “You need to stay away from Bellamy. And stay away from us.”

Echo tutted at Clarke. “Ouch. Are you still bitter about what happened in Polis, Clarke? I truly am sorry I held a knife to your throat. But we're allies now, thanks to me none of you are dead.”

“No, that's down to Kane,” Clarke snapped. “Kane is our ambassador and is working with Roan to keep the peace between the clans, which is what you should be doing if you want your king to stay on the throne!”

“I have unwavering faith in my king, Clarke. His decisions, however, are questionable. His insistence to protect you had me dumbfounded until he told me why he listened to you.”

“That's enough, Echo,” Bellamy warned.

Echo scoffed. “Oh no, it's just the beginning. Because you see – well, I'm sure your little Princess told you – she sentenced us all to death. I feel bad for you, Bellamy, having to deal with her. If you stayed in Polis I would have assured King Roan protected you and made you one of the finest members of his guard.”

That angered Clarke. She would never, ever let anyone take Bellamy away from his people or from her. And she knew he'd never leave. Not like she did. He was the embodiment of hope for their people, her co-leader who it had all began with and she couldn't have him. They couldn't have him.

“That's not happening,” Clarke snapped, “Bellamy has a role here in Arcadia. We are trying to find a solution to the end of the world. He's. Not. Leaving.”

Bellamy looked at Clarke and Clarke couldn't meet her eyes. In her peripheral vision she could see his surprised expression. He looked confused and bewildered and Clarke knew why. She was acting irrational. Leader Clarke was acting irrational. It must've been a rare site because Clarke always held control in front of others but she couldn't help it. Echo got to her.

And there it was, she realized, the sinking feeling in her stomach, the rise of bile in her throat and the fiery anger that stemmed from Echo's provoking words. She was jealous. She was irrationally, hopelessly and stupidly jealous of the prospect of anyone else having Bellamy or taking him away from her. 

Because, she needed Bellamy to breathe and she needed Bellamy by her side. They needed each other and were best together. She knew that now. After he went on the mission, she knew she needed him more than ever. Bellamy Blake was everything to her and was her emotional support and she'd be damned if she ever let him go far away from her again.


End file.
